A New Age Story – It can be anyone among us!
“There is not a single moment to breathe”, said a young manager in an exasperated voice.
He has been running on a tight schedule, being busy with endless meetings with clients, colleagues, subordinates, etc. related to various projects that he has been working on. All this work seemed to be getting on his nerves. He felt tired and miserable and his health has been dipping lately too. He has been, to put it simply, slipping!
He has not been like this always though. He was a bright young man when he joined the organisation. He had dreams and aspirations and seemed eager to learn. His hard work and persistence had made him one of the most promising rising stars in the organisation. But, lately his productivity has been on the decline, he looked out of sorts and sleep deprived.
The work in the organisation has not changed much. No doubt the responsibilities have risen with time, but it was not so much as to push a person to such levels of frustration.
“Maybe he was mentally not cut out for this”, guessed one of his colleagues.
“To go ahead in life one needs to be focussed”
Yes, the guess of his colleague could be, in some ways, correct. The young manager was not just keeping up with his work but keeping up with all the commitments that he has. Afterall, he had to maintain an image of an ‘ideal modern person’ (like Mr. Z), one who not only does his job perfectly, but also keeps up with a lot of social commitments, whether they are online or offline. He also needs to have a slew of attributes which make him seem distinct and superior to others around him – a somewhat superhuman!
| Introducing Mr. Z: The ‘Ideal Modern Person’ Prototype |
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| Mr. Z is the ideal modern person prototype. He seems to have achieved mastery in various necessary skills and exudes the qualities which are expected of a modern person. Simply put, Mr. Z had never tried to stray from the conventional flow, the trying to fit in, the social acceptance. But, the major question that arises is, should we Follow Mr. Z Blindly? |
The chase of this mirage of a superhuman required the young manager to put in a lot of extra effort to try and inculcate these desirable qualities. This trying to ‘win approval of people around him’ attitude slowly took its toll. The ‘trying to fit in’ made him forget that the day just consists of 24 hours. Eventually, he started succumbing to the pressure.
Why do we need Self-discovery?
In some way or the other, we are programmed to emulate, consciously or subconsciously, the ideal modern person prototype. Living our lives within the boundaries of socially accepted norms (however ‘whacky’ they may be!), trying to get approval for our actions or in general our life. But, does living our life, in line with such norms, will eventually make us happy?
Every human being is born with their own set of attributes and aptitudes. The family, community, and society in which we live are also diverse, which eventually also has a role in shaping our aptitudes and attitudes. In this scenario, no two individuals are the same and we cannot fit everyone in one particular mould and think it to be perfect for all. A Gold Medal winning Weightlifter may not win the Gold in a Marathon race and vice versa, does not mean that they are not best.
So we may infer from the above discussion that every person is special in its own way and to be happy, one needs to recognise what is best inside oneself and what makes them happy. Hence, the answer to the question posed above, put in very simple words, lies in a process called ‘self-discovery’. But, what is this buzzword ‘self-discovery’? Let us try and analyse this concept.
What is Self-discovery?
“Be yourself!” – a very common phrase that we might have come across in the course of our lives. Yes, a person needs to be himself/herself, “be original”, to find one’s path, and survive in this ‘big bad world’. But, in order to be themselves, one has to find oneself. The question naturally arises in our curious little minds – who am I?
In literal terms, ‘self-discovery’ can be described as the process of finding oneself – finding the answer to “who am I?”. The question, contrary to the looks of it, is actually a very difficult one, bothering many generations of sages, wise men and philosophers alike. We might come across very deep and astounding works, seeking to address this question of identity. We here will try to limit our discussion to requirements for a balanced and fulfilled life. Rather than going into the academics of it, let us find or establish a workable process to seek this answer.
What can we do for Self-discovery… Just follow the ‘baby steps’!!
You might have seen the undying spirit of a baby trying to take its first step. The process which begins does not end in a day and comprises multiple stages.
First, the baby tries to stand up, with the help of a support. Eventually, it develops the necessary strength and confidence to do it without support. It takes steps (the so called ‘baby steps’) first with support and losing the support in the end to finally walk on its own. It still needs to perfect the art and does it by repeating it over and over again. In the process, it falls, gets bruised, gets up and tries again, meanwhile gathering necessary data and getting better at it.
The fight to stand up just to fall down and repeating the process again – blesses the young child with the bliss of walking. This process can be likened to a process of self-discovery, wherein, we find what’s necessary within us for our survival as well as for our happiness.
So, from the above example, we are able to gather that self-discovery is the process of finding the necessary attributes within you in order to realise the ultimate goal of happiness and self-fulfilment. We also get a glimpse of a sort of ‘process’ for self-discovery. This process, though crude, has been followed since times immemorial in finding oneself.
But, does the process of finding what we are always need to be so crude? The answer is – No! Self-discovery can also not happen sitting at your couch. We need to still apply ourselves to get the necessary results. Some simple steps which can be taken to put things back in order are discussed below.
5 Simple Steps to Start the Process of Self-discovery
(1) Getting a Hold of Our Attention!
The most basic step, and even the primary one, is getting a hold of our attention. As was discussed above, our lack of attention towards our own needs is the biggest hindrance to our well-being. Also, its unregulated application may cause serious issues.
In this day and age it has become extremely difficult to take back control of what we give our attention to – but not impossible. Let us divide the process of getting back control into difficulty levels and try to achieve them (see infographic).
To read about how loss of our attention is affecting our lives and its major causes: click here
(2) Get in to the habit of introspection
This is a very key habit in the process of self-discovery. Finding oneself requires one to think and analyse their actions, requirements, ambitions, strengths, weaknesses, and so on. It also requires one to shed or look beyond the negatives, while learning from them, and finding the positives within. All these can be achieved by following simple processes which again we will be dividing into difficulty levels (see infographic).
(3) Journaling
Again an important aspect in self-discovery. Journaling not only helps us in maintaining a log of things for reference, but also allows us to measure progress over time. Additionally, it also acts as a self-dialogue which helps in analysing certain aspects, sorting the thoughts and ideas in our minds, and at times writing can help us see things in a new perspective too (can come handy!). We can ease ourselves into the process of journaling using these three difficulty levels (see infographic).
(4) Indulge in Self-improvement
As humans, we should always try to learn something new and improve ourselves. Self-improvement may provide us with the necessary confidence and control, meanwhile acting as a guide to the process of self-discovery. For instance, by indulging in the habit of reading, we can develop perspectives which can help us analyse and examine ourselves better. Self-improvement can be in the realms of physical, mental, or spiritual (see infographic).
To watch our videos related to Meditation click here
(5) Challenge Yourself!
As we have seen in the example of the baby above, self-improvement is a process which requires us to delve into the realm of the unknown. Now, it does not mean that we seek out self-harming activities just in the name of self-improvement. Having ambition and trying to achieve newer heights in your personal and professional life can also be a challenge.
The process of self-discovery is a challenge in itself. We may not be successful in one go, but it should not dissuade us. We should look at our failures or relapses as learning opportunities, gather necessary data from it, adapt, and do the required course correction. It is through these internal battles we might be able to improve and become better versions of ourselves, let alone living a happy and fulfilled life.
Wherein lies the balance, therein lies the peace!
Contact the author: abhijit@penperspectives.com
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